Not Your World
by HilaryHilary
Summary: Jack falls for the beautiful, mysterious Kate faster than he'd ever fallen before, while Kate lives in fear of him discovering the reason for her mystery, and the lie that could make him stop loving her. Jate, Skate friendship, some Chaire and Shayid. AU.
1. The Beginning

**Not Your World**

_by HilaryHilary_

* * *

Author's note: This is my first Lost story in a while, so I hope you all like it. I've written the first ten chapters already, so I'll be posting fairly frequently. At least for a while. This is severely AU, so please keep that in mind as you read! Thanks!

* * *

Chapter One: The Beginning

The girl sitting at the bar was his ultimate destination, but he didn't know to go about getting there.

His previous relationships had taught him to be cautious, but he was heartened by the idea that this girl was nothing like any of the others he'd dated before. Her hair, past her shoulders, was left down and left in unruly curls. He could only see part of her face and could therefore not discern whether or not she was truly beautiful, but he had heard her laugh. She was wearing dark blue jeans, a tight black top and high heels. She was focused intermittently on the basketball game playing on the TV screen and the bartender, a blonde man whom she seemed to be familiar with.

This strengthened his resolve. Abandoning his beer on the table he'd been sitting at, he walked over to join her at the bar.

She didn't acknowledge his presence once she sat down. He cleared his throat loudly and announced his presence.

"Hey. I'm Jack Shephard."

The dark haired girl slowly turned to look at him, and he was gratified to see that it had been most definitely been worth the trip. She had green eyes, an infectious smile, and freckles sprinkled across her nose.

"Hey," she said, slightly cautiously. He noticed that she was wearing light makeup.

He'd been hoping she'd offer her name, or perhaps a conversation starter.

"You from around here?" he asked lamely, cringing inwardly. She smiled, recognizing his discomfort.

"More or less."

Damn. She really wasn't giving him anything to work with.

"Me too," he said, even though she hadn't asked.

The girl waited for him to continue.

"Do you want to buy me a drink, Jack?" she said eventually. He nodded gratefully and signaled to the bartender, who'd been noting the exchange in interest.

"Can I get a beer? And a..." he trailed off, motioning to the girl.

"Vodka and coke. Thanks," she said to Jack.

"Sure thing," said the bartender in a Southern accent, bending down to rummage in the bar.

"Friend of yours?" asked Jack carefully, hoping he was being stealth. She shrugged vaguely. Jack relaxed slightly, enjoying the challenge.

"What do you do, Jack?" she asked.

"Do?" A moment later, Jack cursed himself. It wasn't as if he'd never flirted with a pretty girl at a bar. "I mean, I'm a Doctor. Surgeon."

He'd been hoping, absurdly, that this would impress her, but she remained as impassive as ever.

"I didn't know you guys had the time to hang around in bars," she commented. He smiled as a response immediately came to him.

"We don't. That's why I'm trying to spend it wisely," he said. It was true. He'd been on shift for hours, he really should have gone home to sleep.

Smiling appreciatively at his flirtatious comment, she took in his own appearance: dark, short hair, the beginnings of a scruffy beard. Handsome, an air of prosperity, slightly older than her.

"How's your drink?" he asked, glancing at the Southern bartender, now absorbed in the game.

"Good." He paused. Wanting to ask more questions about her life but suspecting she wouldn't answer, he refrained.

He looked up to meet her sparkling green eyes and found himself smiling.

"You have nice eyes," he said. She grinned.

"Thanks. You have nice eyes, too."

Jack, who generally felt his eyes to be brown and unextraordinary, was suddenly proud of them.

"That why you came over to talk to me? My eyes?" she asked. He shook his head, laughing in embarrassment.

"No. Your laugh. You have a nice laugh, too," he revealed.

"Maybe you need to laugh more often," she suggested. He was surprised. Since meeting her, he felt that he'd laughed plenty.

"Maybe."

She offered him one more smile before standing up, waving briefly to the bartender. He stood as well.

"Sorry, Jack Shephard, I've got to run. It was nice meeting you," she said.

"You too," he said regretfully, feeling sure that she was blowing him off. She slid out of her bar stool, her body all but brushing up against his.

He watched her as she walked toward the door.

"Can I have your number? And maybe your name?"

Under normal circumstances Jack would have been embarrassed at calling such a thing across a reasonably crowded bar, but he found himself not caring.

She turned around, laughing again. She shook her head.

"Not just yet."

She exited out of it backwards, and he watched her until she disappeared into the crowd on the street.

* * *

She smiled to herself as she rode home, part of her wishing she had given her number to the handsome stranger. It wasn't as if she could ever have a real relationship with him, but at least she could have someone else to talk to. 

She opened the door of her apartment, stepped inside and turned on the lights.

"Jesus!"

She was momentarily stunned by the figure sitting on the chair in her foyer, but recovered when she realized who it was.

"What are you doing here?" she said tiredly. The older, white haired man smiled as he stood.

"Just came to check on you. And to tell you what a good job you did this evening," he said. She frowned.

"It wasn't a job. We were just talking. I'm not going to talk to him again," she said.

The man laughed.

"Oh, I think you'll find you will.

The girl stared at him stubbornly, wishing he'd reveal his plans to her and also hoping that he would not.


	2. Not Something I'm Going to Get Used To

Chapter Two: Not Something I'm Going to Get Used To

* * *

Author's note: Thanks for the reviewing, and I hope that after this update you all still have faith in me... Enjoy! Thanks for reviewing!

* * *

_One Year Previously_

_Kate Austen sat on a park bench, her legs tucked up to her chest. Her gaze caught between a group of school children playing on a jungle gym, a dog being walked by a couple, and a flock of birds hunting the grassy lawn for bread crumbs. _

_She was beginning to get used to spending her mornings like this, having so little else to do. Not wanting to spend time in her crummy apartment, not having a job to go to until her one at the seedy bar, where she worked in the evenings. Not having any new friends in this new city, not having any connections with her old ones. _

_Kate had never imagined that her mother would react so violently to her vocalization of her feelings for her stepfather, had never imagined that her mother would chose her husband over her daughter and subsequently kick her daughter out of her house. Kate had never imagined that she'd have to leave her peaceful country existence to a harsh, new one in LA, where she lived in all but destitution. _

"_Hello."_

_Kate looked up sharply when a man sat down next to her. He was older than her. She found herself edging away from him, and wondered if she could walk over to the playground, surrounded by other people, and stay there until he left._

"_Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you," he said reassuringly. "I just want to talk."_

"_Why?" she asked, looking up, intrigued. _

"_I've been noticing you. It hasn't been easy for you here, has it?" he asked. She reluctantly shook her head._

"_I don't want to talk about it," she said._

"_Oh, you don't have to. That's your business. But I wanted to let you know that if you want any help, I'm sure I can lend a hand," he said kindly. She looked suspiciously at him._

"_What kind of help?"_

"_It's a bit hard to explain. Why don't you come down to my office next week and we can talk about it?" he suggested, handing her a business card. She read his name, Anthony Cooper, and noted that he worked in an office building downtown. _

"_Okay," she said, shrugging. He stood abruptly, smiling to her once more._

"_What's your name?" he asked casually. She reflected that it was the first time anyone had cared to ask since she'd arrived in LA._

"_Maggie Ryan," she lied. He smiled._

"_I'll be seeing you, Maggie Ryan."_

* * *

_A week later Kate sat at the desk of the stranger, Anthony Cooper, looking doubtfully at the document he'd presented her with. _

"_This is talking about prostitution. You want me to be a __hooker__," she said in disgust. Cooper sat across from her._

"_No, that's not it at all, Maggie. I don't want you to linger on street corners. Sometimes men need a date, but don't want her to be cheap looking, they want a beautiful girl they can take anywhere. A companion," he said._

"_An escort," she corrected him coldly._

"_You misunderstand me, Maggie. This isn't about sex. This just says that I'll take care of you, get you an apartment, get you back on your feet. All I ask in exchange is that you work for me. Go on a few dates with a few nice young men. It would be easy for you," he said. She nodded. _

"_That's all?" she asked nervously. He nodded reassuringly and passed her a pen._

_Hurriedly she signed, not giving herself the chance to reconsider._

* * *

_Two weeks later, Kate found herself feeling completely out of place. _

_The evening had started out better than she'd thought it would – her date was handsomer than she thought someone who hired dates would be, and he'd treated her kindly, not so much as mentioning their arrangement._

_It had been going well until they'd arrived at their destination, a dinner at his boss' house. There she was plied with questions about the state of their relationships and she told a long string of convincing lies, hoping they fit in with whatever story they'd been told. Dressed in a black cocktail dress, she hoped she passed as the girlfriend of a successful businessman. _

_Halfway through the evening she found herself looking into the eyes of another well dressed, blonde man. Self consciously, she wondered if he'd been looking at her all evening. _

_In between courses, she stood and excused herself to go to the bathroom. After the hostess began to explain where it was in the big, rambling house, the blonde man stood up to escort her. Reluctantly she took his arm._

_He led her up the stairs and to a closed wooden door. _

_Kate excused herself to go inside, and frowned in irritation when he followed her in._

"_Excuse me?" she prompted him. He smirked._

"_Come on, freckles. Like you really need to go," he teased._

"_What?"_

_He regarded her for a moment._

"_You're good. You almost had me fooled for a second," he said. He spoke in a smooth Southern accent. _

"_What do you mean?" she asked in irritation._

"_You're not a common whore, are you now? You're a bit too good for that. Who do you work for?" he asked._

_She deflated slightly, realizing she'd been caught._

"_Anthony Cooper."_

_The man smiled. "Ah. Makes sense, they say Cooper only offers the best."_

_Horrified by his discovery of her secret, she failed to notice that he was flirting with her._

"_Don't tell," she begged._

"_I won't. Girl, what do you think __I'm__ doing here?" She smiled. "I'm Sawyer."_

"_Kate."_

_He reached into his wallet and pulled out a crumpled business card, advertising himself as Larry Thatcher, a seller of windows and doors. She raised her eyebrows._

"_Name's fake. Number's real. Call me if you want to talk to someone from your world," he said, patting her arm consolingly and leading her from the bathroom._

* * *

Kate jerked out of her daydream when Anthony spoke to her again. 

"He's a good catch, Maggie. Jack Shephard, thirty-six. Spinal surgeon. You sure do know how to pick 'em."

"I didn't _pick_ him. He was just talking to me."

"I'm suggesting you do pick him, Meg."

Kate frowned.

"No. He didn't hire me. I'll never see him again."

Cooper frowned and rummaged in his briefcase before revealing a document from it.

"Not like that," he said, smiling at the thought. "I'm thinking we can get a great deal more out of this one."

"What do you mean?" she asked shakily.

"He's not the kind of man that _would_ hire you, but I think he's a man who would want a lot more out of you," he explained.

"You want me to con him," she said flatly.

"Exactly."

"I won't."

Kate turned her back on him and walked toward her kitchen.

"Maggie..." Cooper's patient voice followed her. "You know I don't like it when I have to do this. But it's for your own good."

"What is?"

"This is one might suspicious document. Now, Anthony Cooper doesn't even exist. But it seems like this Margaret Ryan does," he said. Kate frowned. Maggie Ryan did not, in fact, exist, but she hadn't hidden her tracks well enough to shed her completely. "It sounds like a shifty sort of business arrangement, don't you think? I'm sure I could find some people who'd agree with me. Your mother, for instance."

Kate scowled as he took an appreciate glance around his surroundings.

"Nice digs you've got. You like living like this?" he asked. She ignored his question.

"Fine. I'll do it."

Anthony smiled, his threatening demeanor instantly vanished.

"I knew you would. Don't worry, I won't hire you out until you're done with this one. We wouldn't want him getting suspicious now, would we?"

Kate watched him go, dread building in the pit of her stomach. She thought of the kind eyes of the man she'd just met, and thought of how deeply she wished she'd never met him.


	3. Keep You Guessing

Chapter Three: Keep You Guessing

"I've got to say, Kate. This really doesn't seem like such a good idea."

Kate held back a sigh as she turned on the coffee machine and began to rummage through the cupboard for cereal.

"You said."

"Do you know how badly this could screw you over? At least with one night jobs it's honest. They know what they're getting in to, but this..."

Kate shrugged, attempting to ignore her roommate's words. Shannon, who had fallen into hard times after the death of her father, had nearly as many misgivings as Kate had about the whole thing but was much more vocal about them.

"Tell Cooper you just want to escort. He can't make you con this guy."

Kate sighed.

"He can though. I mean, we don't have any money for ourselves. He has all of it. He could take this away at any time. And he practically threatened to turn me in," said Kate.

Shannon frowned, her arguments defused.

"I mean, I don't want to do this, but... What else can I do?"

Privately, Kate had to admit to herself that she hated escort work. It came naturally to tall, beautiful, Shannon. Who had grown up wealthy and had learned early on when to hold her tongue. Kate, who had never censored herself for anybody, still found it difficult to be simpering arm candy.

"Was he nice, at least?" asked Shannon hopefully. Kate smiled, suspecting that under her tough exterior, her friend was secretly a romantic.

"Yeah. Nice enough I that I wish I never had to see him again," she said regretfully.

"How are you going to track him, anyway? It's not like you need spinal surgery," said Shannon practically.

"Yeah. I'm going to go back to the bar," she said. Shannon raised her perfectly waxed eyebrows.

"You think he'll show up again?

Kate nodded, thinking of his hopeful expression as he'd asked for her phone number.

"I'm pretty much sure of it."

Kate left the kitchen.

"Sawyer's going to be **furious**," called Shannon, speaking to her retreating form. She sighed and went back to her coffee. She was fairly sure that Kate was playing with fire, but what was she supposed to do about it?

* * *

That night, as Kate attempted to get ready, she found herself completely at a loss. 

It was frustrating to her. After a year of steady occupation, she'd grown very good at all these things. Now what she'd usually wear on a "date" - one of her skirts or dresses, her hair swept up, her face made up, conflicted with what had apparently attracted Jack to her. She wore what she'd generally wear on an evening hanging out with Sawyer. Jeans, a simple black top, her hair loose. Somehow she knew that Jack had no interest in shiny, subdued, escort Kate.

She slid into a different pair of jeans, knowing that this would be by far her most difficult challenge yet.

* * *

The crowd at the bar was smaller. She vaguely remembered a basketball game on TV the night before, and wondered if it was the reason why. It was easy for her to make her way to the bar. She waited apprehensively while Sawyer attended to another customer. 

He grinned when he saw her, his big unapologetic Southern grin.

"Didn't expect to see you here again, Freckles," he said happily. She managed a smile. "Aren't you working most night?"

"I..."

Sawyer glanced up when the door of his bar opened, and he recognized the man from the night before. He glanced quickly back at her.

"What're you playing at, girl? Cooper would be furious if he..."

"He _knows_ I'm here," she muttered quickly. Sawyer's eyes widened slightly as he took in their meaning. Kate waited, her eyes closed, while Jack walked across the bar and toward her.

"Hey."

Even before she looked at him, she could hear the smile in his voice.

"Hey, Jack."

"I didn't think I'd see you here again. You come here often?" he asked.

"Yes, you did. And no, I don't."

Jack laughed. "Well, maybe I did think I would. Hoped, anyway."

He said this last part honestly, his eyes looking deeply into hers. She looked away quickly, reminding herself that their flirtation was no longer innocent.

"How are you?" he asked. She looked back up at him.

"Good. Thirsty."

Jack smiled and turned toward the bartender, about to order when he realized that the other man was scowling at him. He quickly turned back to her.

"Do you want to get out of her?" he asked eagerly.

* * *

The two of them walked along in silence, sipping from cappuccinos they'd purchased from a street vendor. 

"So. Do you really live around here?" he asked her. She laughed.

"Actually I do. I have a roommate, Shannon. She's blonde and high maintenance."

Jack smiled at this description.

"So I get to know the name of your high maintenance roommate, but I don't get to know yours?" he pressed. She looked down at her shoes.

"It's not any fun if it's easy, Jack."

"Do you really not hang out at the bar not that often?" he asked abruptly. She glanced sideways at him.

"What do you think?"

Jack paused, evaluating the expression on her face, wishing he could read it better.

"I think you like me," he stated. Kate nodded. She'd wanted him to think that.

"I think you like me, too."

"I agree," said Jack, laughing.

He stopped walking, putting his hand on her arm to stop her as well.

"Go out with me?" he requested. She shrugged.

"Maybe."

"Then..."

He stopped as she grabbed a pen from her purse, pushed back his sleep and scrawled a number on it in black ink. He grinned.

"Thank you."

Kate nodded, and began to walk the opposite direction of the one they'd been walking, back toward her apartment.

"Tell me your name!" he called after her. She rolled her eyes and turned back to him.

"Kate!" she yelled back, over the noise of the traffic. He grinned, and studied the number scrawled on his arm. Things were looking up.

* * *

Author's note: Thanks for the reviews! Hope you guys are still enjoying it. 


	4. A Tangled Web

Chapter Four: Tangled Web

"You told him your real name?" demanded Shannon the next morning.

Kate sighed, having known that her roommate would react like this.

"What? Cooper expects me to use a fake one," she said.

"But it's not fake. Maggie's fake! Kate's real!" she exclaimed. Kate shrugged.

"Cooper doesn't know that."

Shannon studied her friend, sitting at the kitchen table, a smile playing around her lips.

"God, you actually like him."

Kate shrugged.

"Maybe. It doesn't matter," she said.

"It matters a lot."

Kate stood up abruptly as the phone rang, and then forced herself to walk slowly toward it. She knew Shannon would bring it back to haunt her if she ran for the phone every time it rang.

"Hello?" she said casually into it after the third ring.

"Kate?" came a voice. Kate smiled, liking the sound of her name coming from his mouth.

"Yeah, who's this?" she asked.

"Jack Shephard."

"What's up?"

Once again, she could almost hear him smiling.

"I know it's last minute, but I was wondering if you wanted to go out tomorrow night," he said. Kate paused, pretending to consider.

"Where?" she asked, her curiosity getting the better of her. He laughed.

"What, you're the only one who's allowed to have mysteries? I'll pick you up at seven. Dress code is far from casual, but I'm sure you're up for the challenge."

She paused.

"You don't know where I live," she protested.

"I'm pretty sure you're going to tell me."

* * *

"You're going in that?" 

Kate frowned and glanced down at her outfit when Shannon called out to her from the depths of their apartment.

"Yeah, why?" she asked.

"You don't look like Maggie," explained Shannon. Kate took in Shannon's appearance: the blonde was wearing a long black evening gown, diamonds in her ears, stilettos that made her even more tall, her legs even longer. She looked perfect, immaculate. Kate suspected that Shannon had always looked like this, even before it had been her occupation.

"I'm not supposed to be Maggie," she said patiently. "Jack liked me as Kate."

Kate's hair was up, and she was wearing a fairly simple green dress. Her face, as it had been for the previous two nights, was almost free of makeup.

"You look nice," said Shannon kindly, offering her a reassuring smile as the doorbell rang and Kate left, unwilling to buzz him up to their messy apartment and her gorgeous blonde roommate.

Jack was waiting in the small, enclosed foyer of their building. He grinned when he saw her.

"Hey. You look beautiful," he said.

"Thanks," she said nervously, noting the fact that he was wearing a tux.

"We're going to a fund raiser at the hospital," he explained. She nodded, forcing herself to hide her true feelings on the subject of fund raisers, benefits, fancy sit down dinners in general. She'd attended far too many.

"Great," she said, following him out the front door.

"I know, not very first date friendly. I've got to go, my Dad used to be the Chief of Surgery," explained Jack. Kate's face went slightly whiter. "Neither is meeting the parents, apparently? Don't worry. The reason I've got to go is that he can't."

Kate nodded, relieved. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had to Meet the Parents. The very prospect terrified her.

They arrived at a large, elegant hall, filled with many people who seemed rich and confident to Kate. She was reminded of her first time working as an Escort, and also of many of the times that had followed. She found herself hoping desperately that she wouldn't run into anyone she knew.

They were seated at a table with four other people, Doctors whom Jack seemed very familiar with. Kate noted nervously that all the Doctors and their wives were considerably older than her.

"This is Kate," said Jack eventually, after cordialities had been exchanged. Kate smiled, glad that Jack had not introduced her with a qualifier, such as his date, or his girlfriend. Let them figure it out.

"Hi," she said, nodding as he introduced her to his colleagues. She relaxed as he slid his arm around her shoulders and they listened to them chatter about their jobs, their lives, and the charity they'd gathered to support.

* * *

Kate made it through the meal, having long before figured out which fork to use for what. Jack successfully managed to evade any questions that came their way about their relationship and her life, and halfway through she relaxed and began to enjoy herself, and began to feel that she was on her first Real date in over a year. 

After desert their plates were cleared away. Kate raised her eyebrows when Jack stood up and offered her his hand.

"What, are we leaving?" she asked in surprise. Jack laughed.

"No. We're dancing, come on," he said, pulling her up by the hand. She followed him to a cleared off space in the centre of the room where many other couples were already gathering.

"You dance?" she asked in surprise.

He smiled as he placed one hand on her waist, and kept the one he held already.

"You really don't know what to do, do you?" he asked in interest, as her other hand stayed by her side. Reluctantly, she shook her head. "Put it on my shoulder. And just follow along."

Kate watched their feet for a moment as she got used to the music, but then relaxed and looked up to meet his eyes. He was still smiling.

"Are you having a good time?" he asked.

"Yes," she said. He nodded.

"I'm glad. I think my friends liked you." Kate had surprised herself by liking them, as well.

"You have good friends."

"Maybe I can meet your friends sometime soon?" he pressed. She laughed as he twirled her around and then back into his arms.

"Maybe," she said, refusing to commit herself.

"Okay. That's as good as I'm going to get, isn't it?" he asked. She nodded.

"Probably."

Kate watched as he smiled at her, knowing she was already enthralling him, that he was falling for her and that she was letting him.

"Come out with me this weekend? I have to go someplace, and I think I'd have more with with you there," he said.

"Where?"

"What, you're the only one who gets to be mysterious?" he asked.

"Fine. Not like this again, though?" she asked.

"Not remotely. It's more of a day time thing," explained Jack. She nodded.

"I'll be there," she promised."

* * *

As he said goodnight to her outside her building Jack tried to kiss her, and she almost let him. 

After she'd already gone upstairs and thrown herself onto her bed, still dressed in her nice clothes, she realized it the reason why. She hadn't let him kiss her because she'd wanted him to kiss her. She was hoping, desperately, that he'd lose interest and make her task impossible. Already she was beginning to care.

On her answering machine was a message from Anthony Cooper, requesting a meeting. She called his secretary and scheduled one, hoping that this one would be no worse than the last.

* * *

Author's note: Thanks for your reviews, guys! In case you were wondering, more characters will be introduced as we go along, in particular Claire, Charlie, and Sayid. 


	5. When His Dreams Die, Too

Chapter Five: When His Dreams Die, Too

Kate arrived to her employer's office in plenty of time, but he kept her waiting. He often did.

"Maggie, good to see you," he said, strolling in. She forced a smile.

"You too."

Cooper sat across from her and studied her blatantly. He knew she wasn't checking her out, as he viewed her not as a woman but as an object. Still, it creeped her out as if often did.

"Going well, is it?" he asked. Kate sighed.

"We went to a benefit for his hospital. He asked me out again," she said shortly, refusing to elaborate.

"Did you tell him your name?" asked Cooper. Kate rolled her eyes.

"I told him my name was Kate," he said. Cooper smiled.

"Good. I like it, it suits you. I'm proud of you, you know. You're doing extremely well," he said. Kate knew that he meant this honestly, to make her feel better, but it didn't.

"Thanks. Can I go?" she asked. Cooper frowned.

"Of course."

Kate stood to go, but his voice stopped her as she reached the door.

"Maggie... Did your grandmother ever tell you that 'he won't buy the cow if he can get the milk for free'?" asked Cooper. Kate shook her head, realizing where he was going with this.

"You're telling me not to sleep with him?" she asked in surprise. He'd told her explicitly once that he never expected her to sleep with the men that took her out, but she'd suspected that this would be a different case.

"I like your "mystery" angle. He seems to like it too. You can't let him treat you like a fling," he warned her. She nodded, never having wanted to leave as badly as she did right then.

Kate left abruptly, not waiting for him to offer more advice.

* * *

Almost as soon as she arrived home, Kate was confronted by a flurry of activity. 

All the lights were off and Shannon was following around a Middle Eastern man who carried a toolbox with him, chattering endlessly at him as he checked out various outlets and asked her patiently where he could find the fuse box.

"Kate!" said Shannon, upon seeing her. "I think I blew a fuse with my hair dryer. So I called this guy..."

"Sayid Jarrah," he said, as a form of introduction. Kate nodded.

"To fix everything because like, I have a date tonight. I need electricity. And I guess they're gone now, but Sawyer called a bunch of times. He's angry about something?"

Kate cursed inwardly, remembering Sawyer's shocked expression when she'd spent the evening with Jack after meeting up with him at the bar.

"Damn it. Yeah. Thanks," she said, taking Sayid to the fuse box.

She leaned against the counter and watched in interest as Shannon made calls on her cell phone in the other room.

"She is going on a date?" he asked. Kate raised her eyebrows, surprised by his blatancy.

"No one important," she assured him, knowing even as she spoke that her assurance was unkind. He smiled.

"Does she break her electronics quite often?" he asked hopefully. She nodded.

"All the time. Thanks," she said, leaving as the lights abruptly came back on.

* * *

Kate left for Sawyer's bar when she knew he'd be closing up, hoping to avoid the crowds and to be able to have his full attention. 

When she arrived, he was wiping down tables and placing the chairs on top of them. She watched him apprehensively for a moment, knowing his reaction already.

"Sawyer?" she called, letting herself in.

Sawyer dropped his cloth on the table he'd been wiping and crossed his arms, frowning at her.

"What are you doing, Kate?" he asked. She realized what he already suspected: that she was seducing Jack for her own ends, that Cooper would inevitably find out that she was wasting valuable time on him. Kate knew that Sawyer worried out her occupation, about her volatile boss.

"It's not what you think," she said, realizing slowly that he'd called her Kate, something he rarely did.

"What do I think?"

"That I'm doing something stupid. I mean, I am, but I'm just doing my job," he said.

"You told him your real name. And it sure doesn't seem like he paid for you," said Sawyer. "And what's with you having all this free time?"

"Yeah. But it's different. Cooper wants me to get closer and then..." she paused. "He's a Doctor. Apparently letting me devote all my time to this one is a worthwhile investment to Cooper."

Sawyer scowled.

"This isn't like you. I get the one night thing, but this is dishonest."

She nodded.

"I don't like it, but... I don't have a choice, Sawyer."

She cautiously made her way into the bar and toward him. He was her best friend, and she knew that he knew the world that she'd accidentally gotten herself into better than anyone.

"And you like him. That's a problem, too," observed Sawyer. She frowned. She'd hoped that he hadn't noticed this.

"I don't."

"You told him your real name," he stated. She glared at him in instant denial.

"I told you and Shannon my real name," she reminded him. He shook his head.

"That's different, Freckles. Shannon and me aren't honest. Jack's different. He's not from our world," said Sawyer.

"Maybe it won't work. I don't know if I can hold him like that," she protested. Sawyer scoffed.

"You already are."

If Sawyer said this with a trace of regret, Kate didn't catch it.

"We're going out again on Saturday."

Sawyer nodded.

"Be careful, Freckles."

"Why?"

"Because you're setting out to break his heart. Don't let him break yours," explained Sawyer. She smiled, touched, and moved forward into his arms. He wrapped them protectively around her, wishing she would let him protect her from the world.

"I've got to go," she said, her cheek resting on his shoulder. "I promised Shannon we'd talk once she gets home."

Sawyer nodded.

"Be careful. Do you want me to walk you?" he asked worriedly. She shook her head.

"I'll be careful."

As she left, she thought of how often they'd been using the word. Careful was something she had promised to be, and was also something that was impossible.

* * *

Author's note: So next chapter is my favourite so far. It's the second date of Jack and Kate and introduces Charlie and Claire and Aaron, too. I had such a good time writing it. But this one was fun too, because of Sawyer. Hope you guys liked it, too. 


	6. Welcome to My Life

Chapter Six: Welcome to My Life

"Why won't you tell me where we're going?" asked Kate, as they drove out of the city in his car. Jack smiled.

"Maybe because I was pretty sure you'd chicken out if I did?" he suggested. She shot him a suspicious look.

"Where are we going?" she asked, not for the first time.

"My sister's house. It's my nephew's second birthday," he explained.

"You really don't date like normal people, do you?" she demanded, as they pulled up in front of a large suburban house. He shook his head.

"Really don't. Come on," he said, walking around to her side of the car to open her door.

* * *

Whatever Kate had been suspecting, Claire Shephard was not it. 

She hid her surprise as she was introduced to the bubbly young mother. She was considerably younger than her elder brother, and was extremely fair – light hair, blue eyes. She spoke with the slightest trace of an accent (Australian, Kate guessed), and smiled whenever her eyes fell on her toddler aged son, who was equally blonde and wearing a party hat.

Her husband, Charlie, was British and equally friendly. He was less innocent looking, but equally welcoming, if surprised, to see his brother-in-law with a woman.

The large backyard of their house was semi-full with children his age and their mothers and some without children, clearly friends and relatives. Kate found herself feeling reassured when Jack took her hand in his.

He only released it when his three year old nephew launched himself into his uncle's arms. Kate watched in surprise as he easily interacted with the small child and listened patiently to his childish rambling. It was yet another side of him she wouldn't have expected.

"What's his name?" she asked as he ran off, distracted by another party guest. Jack took her hand once more.

"Aaron. He's a good kid," said Jack fondly. Kate found herself wondering why his sister was so much younger, and where she'd met her British rock star like husband, but forced the questions out of her mind. Curiosity, she feared, would lead to attachment.

"You spend a lot of time with him?" she asked cautiously. He nodded.

"As much as I can. I work a lot," he explained. "But I wouldn't miss this."

Kate glanced around at the scattered groups of laughing party guests, the small children with party hats, the balloons tied to the house and trees.

"Me neither," she said happily, looking into his eyes.

* * *

Four hours later, Kate watched in interest as seeming Super Parents, Claire and Charlie, dropped into the couch in exhaustion, their son having already fallen asleep on the floor. Jack had taken him up to bed. 

"It's a lot of work for someone who doesn't really understand what's going on," said Charlie critically, smiling at his wife. Claire flashed a smile at Kate.

"Charlie thinks that ten three year olds eating cake all day and chasing each other around the yard is extreme," she explained. Kate smiled.

"He seemed to be having a really great time," she said.

"Oh, he did. And I'm sure we'll work off the exhaustion in time for the next one," said Charlie sarcastically, sitting up straighter.

"That bad?" asked Kate sympathetically. Charlie opened his mouth to speak but was shushed by his wife.

"Don't let him discourage you. Have you and Jack been dating long?" asked Claire. Kate bit her lip apprehensively – she'd been afraid to be away from Jack all day in fear of this conversation.

"Not at all," she managed to say breezily. Claire nodded and subtly analyzed her for a moment.

"Where did you meet?" she asked in interest.

"In a bar," said Kate, blushing. Claire smiled encouragingly.

"I met Charlie while he was on tour in England," admitted Claire. Kate nodded, wondering it this was a more PC translation of "groupie."

"I thought you looked familiar," said Kate to Charlie. He nodded.

"Sweet story, actually. Then she got pregnant and we came back here to get married," said Charlie. Kate smiled.

"Dad was thrilled, of course," said Jack, re-entering the room. He sat on the chair of the arm she'd been perched on.

"I can imagine," she agreed, watching Claire blush.

"The best part was when I had to be introduced to her tall, dark brother as the boy who'd knocked up his baby sister. I thought for sure he was going to kill me and make it look like an accident," said Charlie ruefully.

"We're beginning to look tame," said Kate, smiling at Jack over her shoulder. He reached up and pulled her down onto his lap.

"Compared to these guys? I know it's hard to believe, with the perfect suburban house and the blonde kid and the station wagon, but don't let this girl fool you," Jack teased. Claire playfully scowled at him.

"You were always the good one," she lamented. Kate relaxed and leaned against Jack, calmed by the easy environment and witty banter.

"Someone had to be. You were running around, dying your hair black, getting detention..."

"Getting pregnant..." added Charlie. Claire shoved him, still smiling.

"Can we maybe talk about something else? Anything else?" requested Claire.

"Did you grow up in LA, Kate?" asked Charlie.

"No, Iowa," she said, meeting Jack's eye as she spoke. "I moved out here a year ago."

"What do you do for a living?" he asked.

"I'm a secretary," she said, having already thought of the question.

"Charlie teaches guitar and I manage a day care centre with one of the other mothers," said Claire. Kate nodded.

"Then shouldn't you be used to this kind of thing?" she asked curiously. Claire rolled her blue eyes.

"Cake makes a difference. The balloons, too," she explained.

"Like you wouldn't believe," said Charlie, slinging an arm around her and leaning his head against the back of the couch in exhaustion.

* * *

Jack parked his car in a lot and walked her the three blocks home. 

"I liked your sister," said Kate.

"I think she liked you, too," said Jack. Kate smiled.

"They're a nice couple."

"They are. She ran away to Europe as soon as she graduated. She only came home when she'd been knocked up by a rock star. Our Dad practically had a heart attack, but Charlie stepped up and it all turned out okay," explained Jack.

"She's... younger than you," said Kate awkwardly. He nodded.

"She's my half sister. My Dad had an affair with her Australian mother, and she only came to live with us when her mom died. She was about three, I was already a teenager," he said.

"Wow."

"Our Mom was furious, but she brought her up anyway. She's a good kid," he said fondly. "According our Dad she was never on the right track, like me, but he loved her."

"Why wasn't he there?" she asked curiously.

"My Dad died two years ago and my Mom is on vacation in France," he explained shortly.

"Oh."

They'd reached her apartment building. Kate leaned against the door, wondering if he was going to try to kiss her again. He seemed to have learned his lesson.

"I had a really nice time tonight," she said honestly.

"Me too."

She leaned in and bravely kissed his cheek before letting herself into the building. Though she didn't know it he watched her as she walked in, still smiling even after she'd vanished from sight.


	7. Calling Out Your Name

Chapter Seven: Calling Out Your Name

Jack's house was very far from hers. He did not have a roommate, as she did, who often wandered around in her underwear. He lived in a house with a pool in the backyard, in an affluent neighborhood that could not be more worlds apart from where she lived.

He was cooking for her. Something about this was desperately adorable to Kate.

His furnishings were sparse and elegant. Everything had hard edges, modern design. It was beautiful as well as being cold.

There were some framed photographs in the bookshelves, in between thick volumes about medicine, art, philosophy. Jack, apparently, was a renaissance man.

Some of the pictures were of him with his family, a younger Claire, an older woman and a man who looked like Jack. Some were of his college days, and a few were of Jack with a blonde woman. Kate made a mental note to ask Jack about her and made her way back to his kitchen.

"Find anything interesting?" asked Jack. Kate smiled, realizing that he'd known she'd been snooping.

"Not particularly," she admitted. She watched as Jack fried vegetables on the stove. He was making her steak, wild rice, and stir fry. She would have been satisfied with pasta and sauce from a jar.

"Sit down," he requested, feeling her hover behind him. She slowly sat in a cushion covered stool.

"Who's the blonde?" she asked abruptly. Jack turned around to look at her in surprise, and seemed to search in her face for jealousy.

"Sarah."

"Sarah Who?" she asked in interest. Jack turned around again, resting against the counter.

"Sarah Shephard," he admitted. "We were married for three years five years ago."

"Oh."

Kate wondered if Jack wanted to ask her more, but found she didn't want to know. The fact that Jack had already suffered at least one major heartbreak was more than she wanted to know.

Later, when they sat down at his dining room table, Kate reflected that this was the first date that had felt like a real date.

"Our dates are usually less traditional," she stated.

"I like that you can be so up front about what you're thinking," he said.

"I just mean that there are always other people around," she explained. He nodded.

"Yeah, I know. I was hoping to get to know you a bit better," he explained. Kate's eyes widened in surprise, instantly mistaking his meaning.

"What?"

"I mean I don't even know your last name. Or why you left home, or anything about your family." Jack stopped. "Why do you look like that?"

"You want to get to know me better?" she repeated.

"What?"

Kate stood angrily, crumpling her napkin in her hand.

"We've barely even gone out yet," she protested. Jack realized what she was talking about and rose as well.

"I know that. I didn't mean... I just meant that we don't know each other that well yet. Calm down, if you don't want to do any of that yet it's fine with me," he said soothingly. She glared at him. It was an issue she hadn't had to face – Cooper, for all his flaws, was very strict with his clients about the boundaries of his girl's duties. She was caught between the fear that being with Jack would make her feel a whore, and the equally strong fear that physically being with him would cause her to feel even more deeply for him.

"I told you about my life. I told you were I was from, what I do," she argued.

"You told my little sister. And you told her because you couldn't get out of telling her. What are you hiding?" he demanded, his calm slowly ebbing away.

Kate rolled her eyes and turned to go, ignoring him when he called after her.

Jack watched her walk away from him, watched even as she disappeared from the room and all that was left were her footsteps, heading down the hall and toward the door. Mustering up his courage, he followed her at a run.

He called her name as he neared her, but she ignored him. Grasping her arm he turned her around in one, swift motion, and kissed her.

After a moment of shock Kate kissed back, pressing herself up against his hard body and wrapping her arms around him. She felt as if every sense was on fire when he wrapped his arms around her, pressed her up against a wall and cautiously began to explore her body with his hands.

He kissed her neck, and the scruffy hair on his face tickled her sensitive skin. His lips found her their way back to hers and they kissed passionately, already having gone too long without.

He pulled away, smiling gently at her. She stopped him as he made to kiss her again.

"My last name," she began, pausing for affect. "Is Austen."

Jack nodded as she became aware that his arms were still around her, that she was still pressed between him and a wall, that she was desiring him enough to let him take her right then and there.

"I really need to get out of here," she said. She half expected him to kiss her, half expected herself to let him, but his hands reluctantly left her body. She stayed in pressed up against him for a moment before sliding out, grabbing her coat off the rack and moving to the door Jack had opened for her.

"Call me," she entreated, smiling at his stunned reaction. He leaned down to kiss her once more. She hastily stepped out of the house.

Her cell phone rang as she walked to her car, but she ignored it. Knowing it was Cooper, and knowing she couldn't possibly let him in to ruin the moment.


	8. Let It Go

Chapter Eight: Let It Go

Sawyer was happy, but suspicious when Kate walked into his bar the several nights later, dressed casually and smile free.

"Don't you have a date?" he asked suspiciously, not meeting her eyes as he expertly mixed drinks.

She shook her head, thinking of the several messages clogging her answering machine. Messages that were still calm, collected, but were developing a hint of worry, of loss.

"Nope."

"You always have a date. Does this mean you're avoiding him, Freckles?" he asked, handing the drink to a man at the bar and glaring at him when he made to turn to Kate.

"You never stopped to think that maybe he's not into me anymore?" she asked. Sawyer scoffed.

"Well, I have seen 'im look at you. Don't think it's going to happen anytime soon," he said bluntly. Sawyer watched as she smiled softly to herself. "Something happened?"

"Something happened," confirmed Kate.

Sawyer was distracted as a group came to the bar, all demanding drinks at once. He served them all, easily chatting with them as he did so.

"What happened? And now don't make me guess. I know you're all mysterious, but I'm busy," he said flatly.

"He kissed me."

Whatever Sawyer had been expecting, this was not it.

"What, for the first time?" he asked in bemusement. Kate nodded.

"Yeah."

"So what are you doing here with me?" asked Sawyer. Kate stared at him, seeing how through Jack's eyes, how she knew Jack had seen him. As a tall and attractive man, to who she was closer than any other. Intimidating, a relationship he'd always he on the outside of.

Kate saw Jack through the eyes of Sawyer: richer, more successful in terms of money and of life. Stable, infinitely so, where he was unpredictable. Equally tall, similarly handsome, a threat to his relationship with Kate, the only one with a woman he'd ever had to have any lasting value.

"It's okay, Freckles," he said, seeing the worry in her eyes. "We can avoid him together tonight."

* * *

"How come you didn't let him kiss you 'till now?" asked Sawyer. Kate looked up in surprise - they'd just closed the bar together, and had been silent for almost an hour. 

"Cooper told me not to sleep with him," explained Kate shortly. Sawyer nodded.

"And he gives you shivers, does he? Is it because he's a Doctor? Chicks always dig the Doctor."

"You're gross," said Kate, smiling.

He watched her, smiling, as she overturned the chairs onto the tables and collecting coasters, a slight bounce in her step.

"He makes you happy," observed Sawyer.

"He does. But it makes me unhappy, too."

He reflected that it was surreal, that he was sitting in his bar after hours, discussing her rich, Doctor boyfriend with his best friend. Who he'd always felt the need to protect, and who was slowly needing him less.

"Is he in love with you yet?" asked Sawyer casually. Kate almost dropped the glass she was carrying.

"No. Of course not. He doesn't even know me," sputtered Kate.

"Well I know that, but I also know that he seems to like it that way," said Sawyer in surprise. He realized that Kate knew exactly how to play him but didn't even always know she was doing it. She was barely playing him at all. It was just how she was.

Kate looked down, and he realized he'd been staring at her. He quickly looked away, focusing his attention instead on wiping down the bar and locking up the register.

"Are you leaving? Don't you have a date?" she asked. Sawyer cringed at her assumption. It was so painless to her.

"Sure do. Didn't I tell you I'd be hanging out with my best girl all night? Let's play darts."

Laughing, she followed him to the dart board, knowing that there was no better way to drown sorrow or kill her time than to do it with Sawyer.

Neither of them observed the man that tried the door only to find it locked. And then peered inside and found only two figures, laughing and standing together, almost touching. One of whom was a man he barely knew and the other a woman he knew well, one who had told him; on a hurried message on his answering machine; that she was far too busy to spend the evening with him. Sighing, the man turned away again.

* * *

"Do you want to spend the night? Your house is far. And we have an extremely nice couch." 

Sawyer smiled at Kate's offer. She offered quite often, even though he'd never accepted and never planned to.

"It's not that far, and you two make too much noise in the morning," he complained, even if he didn't know it was true. Kate was cut off in mid eye-roll when the door to their apartment opened and a familiar man came out, one with sun darkened skin and dark curly hair. Kate stared at him quizically for a moment before she placed him.

"Sayid?"

He nodded, moving down the hall silently. She stifled a giggle.

"I really have to go now. Thanks for hanging out with me," she said, disappearing into the apartment.

Shannon was lying on her bed, a magazine on her lap, clearly pretending that nothing was out of the ordinary. Kate folded her arms and waited for her roommate to acknowledge her.

"What?" she asked eventually, annoyance evident in her tone.

"The electrician? You surprise me sometimes."

Shannon scoffed.

"He was around."

"You like him," said Kate, enjoying the rare opportunity to taunt Shannon in return.

"I do not."

"You do. You're actually risking everything for this. Cooper would be furious," said Kate, her tone still gleeful.

"I still do my job," protested Shannon.

"Sayid isn't a job. He's what, your boyfriend? Did you tell him your real name?" asked Kate in interest. Shannon, in professional capacity, went by Grace Carlyle.

"Yeah," she said defensively. "Like you're one to talk."

Kate shrugged.

"I'm proud of you. He seems like a good guy," said Kate honestly. Shannon nodded, and finally looked up.

"I think so too. Is Cooper really going to be angry? Like, angrier than when he finds out that you're falling for Jack?" asked Shannon nervously. Kate ran to sit beside her roommate, assuring him that it would be, for both of them, and that above all it would all turn out alright.

* * *

Author's note: Sorry, when I went to post the last chapter, I accidentally posted this one instead. Hope not too many of you were confused, I tried to fix it as soon as I could. Also I'm sorry that there keep being breaks between my posts... I'll try and work on that.

Next chapter is entirely Jate focused again.


	9. Someone Else's Song

Chapter Nine: Someone Else's Song

It was not how he'd imagined his first visit to her home.

Her first visit to his home had been similarly unpredictable. There had been talking, there had been peace. There had been revelations, there had even been kissing. There had also been yelling, arguments over nothing.

Still. If he'd been having any doubts, if it had all begun to seem unattainable, the kiss was enough to vanish them. He'd been surprised when she'd broken away, because her desire was so clearly as deep as his. It had been so comforting, to know how she was feeling, if only for a moment.

It had been a surprising, but ultimately satisfying visit. He doubted that this one would be nearly as satisfying.

He casually let himself in as a tenant was leaving, and made his way up the elevator to her floor. Praying for the best, he knocked on the door.

It was answered by a tall blonde girl in an evening gown, who after a moment of confusion smiled at him knowingly.

"Jack, right?" she asked. He nodded slowly. "I've heard so..."

Shannon was interrupted when Kate arrived in the doorway. Jack smiled at her, happy to set eyes on her after her avoidance of him.

"Okay, I really don't want to be around for this. I'm going to go. Good luck," she said, directing her comment at Jack.

Kate turned her back on him and walked into the kitchen and he found himself following her. She finally faced him again, leaning against the counter.

Jack stared at her. Though she'd been dressed casually on almost all of their dates, this was different. She was dresses in pajama pants and a tank top, her hair tied back messily. It was so natural, so intimate somehow. He hungrily devoured the sight, usually so deprived of intimate moments with her.

"How did you know to come here?" she asked. After a moment, he realized that she was referring to her apartment number.

"You told me your last name," he reminded her. Kate nodded.

"You know, you could have just called."

"I would have, but your phone apparently doesn't work," he said in annoyance. She shrugged.

"I've been busy."

Even as she said this, she knew it was among the lamest of the excused she'd ever given him, and quickly wished she had not said it.

"Last night, with your friend at the bar. I saw."

"What?"

"Come on, of course I went. I went there even before I met you. I was kind of surprised to see him close up shop so early, but not as surprised as when I found out that this was what you were doing when you told me you were too busy to go out with me."

Kate stared at him, trying to conceal her anger.

"I came all the way over here for a girl who apparently isn't even my girlfriend. I'm being unbelievably pathetic. Don't I at least deserve an explanation?"

"Sawyer is my **best friend**," said Kate in disbelief. "I hung out with him **way** before I knew you. And seeing as I'm clearly not your girlfriend, not answering your calls should be all I have to do to break up with you!"

Jack stared at her, wishing he had even the slightest capability to understand what she was going on about.

"Does that mean you want to be my girlfriend?" he asked in confusion. Kate let out a noise of frustration.

Jack ran his hands through his short dark hair, wishing he was better at controlling his temper.

"I can't have another fight with you over nothing," he said flatly. She nodded.

"Look, Sawyer is just my friend. He always has been. Nothing more," she promised. "So you're going to have to deal with that."

Jack nodded compliantly, encouraged by her calm voice.

"I was with him because I needed to think, and Sawyer on occasion is pretty good at figuring out my thoughts."

"Are they figured out now?" asked Jack.

Kate took a half step toward him. Realizing that she was planning on kissing him, but that she was also going to be slow about it, Jack moved forward the extra three steps and kissed her.

She remained in his arms, smiling as he wrapped them tightly around her and firmly kissed the top of her head.

"You do want to be my girlfriend, don't you?" he teased. She shrugged easily.

"Maybe."

"You'll fix your answering machine?" he asked. She leaned back to meet his eyes.

"I will," she promised.

After a quick rummage through the cupboards revealed Shannon and Kate to be remarkably low on edible food, they called to order Chinese food and ate it on their laps in front of the TV.

Kate gradually leaned in to him as they watched, and after a while he cautiously slid his arm around her shoulders.

It was, he reflected, the most normal date they'd ever had.


	10. Take What You Want From Me

Chapter Ten: Take What You Want From Me

"Maybe I should go."

Jack rolled his eyes at his girlfriend's nervous proclamation. Ever since she'd arrived at his house that evening, she'd been desperately searching for reasons to go.

"Come on," he entreated. "My mom's arriving in half an hour. If you're not there she's going to think I made you up."

"Claire and Charlie can back you up," she protested in vain. They'd already arrived, Aaron left at home with a babysitter.

He walked over her and kissed her. As desperately as she wanted to leave now, it could not fairly paint a picture of their relationship. They'd grown close in the last two months, and she'd become as comfortable in his home as he had become in hers.

And so, after a long string of extremely successful and varied dates, several spontaneous hang out sessions and some extremely unsatisfying make out sessions, she was meeting his mother.

And she knew, instinctively, that she would not be approved of.

Kate wandered into Jack's family room to find Claire, who was watching TV on the sofa with her husband. Kate smiled gratefully at her, suspecting that Margo Shephard had never fully approved of Claire, either. Which made her an ally.

"Don't worry," said Charlie, noting Kate's expression as she sat. "She can't possibly hate you as much as she hates me."

Claire scoffed.

"Sure she can. Jack's the golden boy," said Claire, silencing after a sharp look from her husband. Kate laughed nervously.

"I really don't know what to expect," she admitted.

"Understandable. Margo's unpredictable. But seeing as you're not meeting her for the first time after knocking up her daughter, you've pretty much got to do better than me."

Kate nodded, more calmed by this than anything they'd said so far. Charlie and Claire almost inevitably put her into a good mood – despite their unusual beginnings, and their hectic life, they were happy. They were normal. She couldn't help but admire how well they worked together, how they even seemed to match, both being so small and blonde.

The doorbell rang and Kate sprang up, instantly alert and thoroughly unwilling to meet Margo without Jack's protection. He smiled when they met up by the front door, back by Charlie and Claire.

"Hey Mom. How was France?"

Margo Shephard was an elegant middle aged woman, well dressed and groomed. Kate's immediate reaction was that the woman was nothing like her own mother. Her second was that she was nothing like either of her children.

"Wonderful. How are you, Jack?" she asked, smiling as her son put his arms around her.

"Hey Mom," said Claire nervously, as if anticipating anything her step-mother could send her way.

"Claire." Margo embraced her as well, and Claire sent a reassuring look to Kate over her shoulder before Margo moved on to frostily shake hands with Charlie.

Jack instinctively took Kate's hand in his as his mother turned to her last. Margo's eyes traveled slowly from her face, her wild dark hair and green eyes, down to her slim body. And finally to her hand, clasped firmly in that of her son.

"This is my girlfriend, Kate," said Jack. Margo produced a smile.

"Lovely to meet you." She turned to Jack as if Kate was no longer there. "She's nothing like Sarah, is she?"

After another frosty smile, Margo allowed herself to be hastily led away by her stepdaughter and son – in – law, who immediately began to fill the silence with news about their son.

Kate glanced nervously up at Jack.

"Is that a good thing?" she asked in a whisper, leaning up to speak into his ear. He kissed her quickly.

"I always thought it was."

Still hand in hand, they progressed toward the back of the house, where Margo was sitting, Charlie and Claire on either side. They were looking at baby pictures, which seemed to distract her. She frowned when she came across one from the birthday party, of her grandson being held between Jack and Kate. She glanced up at the real live couple, and seemed to be surprised as the subtle intimacy she saw.

"How long have you two been together?" she asked, slightly dismissively, as Jack sat down on the loveseat, pulling Kate to sit beside him as she sat down as well.

"Three months," said Jack, making Kate glad that they had a slightly more definite answer than when she'd first met Claire.

"What does your father do?" she asked pleasantly.

"He's a soldier," she admitted reluctantly. Margo nodded.

"I'm a secretary."

For a second, Kate longed to throw it in her face, wipe the smugness from her face if only for a moment: _I'm a whore. Sort of. Your son is falling for me, and sooner or later I'm going to screw him over._

"And where..."

"Quit it with the third – degree, Mom," said Jack, semi – playfully.

"I was born in Iowa Mrs. Shephard," said Kate, hoping to avoid conflict. Margo nodded sharply, and they lapsed into silence.

* * *

"She seems secretive, Jack," said Margo quietly.

Jack rolled his eyes. He had intentionally not asked his mother her opinion on his new girlfriend, but she had managed to deliver it despite this, within their first moment alone together.

"She's mysterious. And I like that," he said frankly. "She keeps me on my toes."

Margo raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"I know her kind of woman. She's trying to be mysterious. We didn't need to worry about Sarah. She was well brought up, she was from our world. I don't trust Kate."

"You don't have to," said Jack in annoyance.

"You're independently wealthy. You're divorced. Your father just died. She's younger than you, Jack. Doesn't it all seem a bit suspicious right now?" she demanded.

Jack's eyes widened as he caught sight of another figure, over his mother's shoulder. Kate took a half step out of the room, and from the expression on her face it was obvious she'd overheard the entire conversation.

"Kate..." he said, sounding pained. Kate glanced at Margo's face, only to find her looking completely blank. She turned around and began to walk determinately toward the front door.

"So dramatic," muttered Margo under her breath, as Jack shot her a seething look.

"You don't even know her," muttered Jack angrily, leaving the kitchen to run after Kate.

* * *

"KATE!"

Kate stopped so suddenly that Jack almost ran into her, turning around sharply to meet his eyes.

"I can't handle this," she said. "I can't handle any of this, and I can't handle you running outside to me every time I freak out."

"I'm more than happy to run to you whenever you freak out," said Jack honestly. Rolling her eyes she turned away from him, heading toward the sidewalk where her car was parked.

For a moment Jack watched her, knowing how deeply Margo's words had hurt her, knowing that he should have stopped her before she'd had the chance to go so far. Knowing, now, that he had to make up for it.

Instinctively, he caught up to her in three long strides and grabbed her wrist to turn her around to face him again.

"Stop running away from me," he said.

"I'm a runner. I always have been," she said desperately. He nodded.

"I need to tell you something. I need to tell you, and I need you to hear it. Even if it's just this once."

Kate's look never stopped him nor pushed him forward.

"Look, my mom's suspicious. She always has been. And maybe Sarah was blonde and well brought up, or whatever, but I want _you._ And I know this is going to freak you out and make you avoid my calls for a while, and I'm fine with that, because you deserve the time to think. So I'll leave you alone if you want. But Kate..."

"Jack?" Kate was now curious, the anger all but vanished at her face, no longer annoyed at his intrusive hand on her wrist.

"I love you," he said fervently. She only had time to nod in confusion before his lips were on hers, his hands on her back, bringing her body in to his.

Without effort, without conscious thought, she found herself kissing him back with the same need and for a moment thought that the words would appear on her lips, as well.

However, as he continued to kiss her in plain sight, for all the world to see, she realized that he was not going to demand it of her.


	11. Things Start Splitting at the Seams

Chapter Eleven: Things Start Splitting at the Seams

After his fervent declaration, after their passionate kiss, after the words that had altered their relationship for ever, they'd been remarkably adept at pretending that nothing had happened.

Kate had followed him back inside, made it all the way through the meal and had even managed to avoid the temptation to stay the night with him after he kissed her again.

After Margo left, soon followed by Kate, Charlie and Claire lingered at his home. While Charlie dozed on the sofa, Claire helped her big brother with the dishes.

"What did Mom say?" she asked abruptly. Jack found himself smiling, relieved to be around someone who would understand without being shocked.

"Something about how Kate's a gold digger. She was pissed," he admitted. Claire nodded.

"Not surprising."

Jack nodded vaguely.

"How did you get her to come back?" pressed Claire.

Jack, who had been drying the clean dishes with a dish cloth, stopped abruptly.

"I followed her outside. I told her I loved her," he said simply. Claire nodded.

"Yeah. I kind of suspected."

Jack nodded vaguely, unsurprised that his sister had figured it out before his girlfriend.

"She didn't say it back," said Jack, without emotion. Claire nodded.

"Did you expect her to?" she asked carefully.

"Not really."

Claire paused, suddenly feeling inadequate.

"She cares about you," she said helpfully. Jack nodded, dried another dish.

"Yeah. I think she does. Just maybe not as much as I care about her."

* * *

Kate made her way home in the dark night, thoughts that she could not process swirling through her head. 

She found herself relieved when Shannon was already home. She had not expected her to be. Though she and Shannon had not gotten along well when they'd begun living together in the apartment that Cooper had procured for them a year previously, they'd slowly become attached to each other, united by their unconventional lives.

Not waiting for Shannon to call to her, knowing that she eventually would, Kate headed for her roommate's bedroom.

"Hey," she said, leaning against the door frame. "How was your evening?"

"Fine. It was a wedding, nice cake. Are you okay?"

Shannon, finally glancing up, had caught sight of Kate's expression.

"Jack's mother hates me," she said. Shannon nodded.

"You are pretty much preparing to screw over her son. It's to be expected. Is that all?" she asked.

"Jack told me he loves me," said Kate, in the same casual tone. Shannon's eyes widened.

"It's been like three months!" she exclaimed in disbelief.

"Tell me about it."

She wandered into the room and sat cross legged on Shannon's bed.

"But you knew, didn't you?" asked Shannon curiously. Kate shook her head.

"How did you not know? _I_ knew. _Sawyer_ knew. His mom probably knew, too. Why else would she care so much?" wondered Shannon.

"Sawyer knew? Why didn't he tell me?" she asked in annoyance. Shannon rolled her eyes.

"You're so God damn clueless. What else did he say?" asked Shannon.

"Something about how he was going to give me time to think, and that if I wanted to avoid his calls for a little while he'd understand."

"He knows you. He actually knows you," said Shannon in disbelief.

"I know. How screwed up is that?"

Shannon laughed as Kate stretched out along the bed next to her, clearly having no desire to spend the night alone with her thoughts.

* * *

Jack Shephard had never been as surprised in his entire life as he was the next day, when he got a call from Kate as soon as he got home from work. 

He hurriedly agreed to meet her for dinner, and once again they fell into a pattern.

* * *

Two months later, by which point Jack slowly began to get to know her better, he began to admire her skill at deflecting him every time he made up his mind to speak his mind to her. 

It was truly impressive, he reflected. She manged to move on from the scene in front of his house with ease, never mentioned it, never demanded an explanation for his words. Never so much as acted surprised that he'd declared himself to her so early on in their relationship.

Things went on much as they'd gone on before – easy going, affectionate, intimate without being fully intimate. They spent time in each other's apartments, they had double dates with Charlie and Claire, they avoided meeting with Margo. She manged, adroitly, to avoid true intimacy, and they progressed forward while still existing in a standstill, ever waiting for the other to make the next move.

It was he who broke first, once again. It was he who refused to stop sliding cautiously forward. It was he who made the integral, inevitable move, who finally put it all out in the open.

* * *

They were walking. Jack reflected that they spent a lot of time walking. He had realized long ago that she liked walking, in silence or not. He had realized that this made Los Angeles a surprising choice of city for her. Not for the first time, he wondered why she had not stayed in her home state of Iowa. He'd heard her refer to it only fleetingly, but the references had been fond. In her apartment in the big, anonymous city was not how ultimately she wanted to live. 

"You seem to be thinking pretty hard," remarked Kate as they walked. Jack smiled, glad that at least now she was in the mood to talk.

"I'm thinking about you," he revealed impulsively. Kate nodded, her face now blank.

"I thought maybe you were."

Los Angeles was not a city comprised of many parks, but they had managed to find one. They were walking through it as the sun began to fall from the sky. He'd come to the conclusion that this would be the night he'd break, and had planned accordingly.

"Kate..." he grabbed her hand and stopped in the middle of the path, stopping her with him. "I meant what I said."

She raised an eyebrow.

"What I said in front of my house. When I told you I love you," he expanded. She nodded.

"I know you did."

"I can't not move forward with you. I need this to go somewhere. I want to know everything about you. I don't want just to drift anymore," said Jack urgently.

"Are you breaking up with me?" she asked in surprise. Jack laughed.

"You've been pretty intuitive today, but you just lost major points. I never want to break up with you." He rummaged in his inside jacket pocket.

He revealed the object he'd been searching for. A small, square ring box.

"I never want to break up with you," he said again. "I want to marry you."

He paused awkwardly as her mouth dropped open and he revealed the diamond within the ring box.

"Do you want me to kneel?"

* * *

Author's note: MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Hope it's going well for you all!!! And I hope this Jate fluff is a good enough Christmas present. 


	12. Burn Your Life Down

Chapter Twelve: Burn Your Life Down

"You did something stupid again, didn't you?"

Kate glared at Shannon when she greeted her before she could escape to her own room. A natural reaction.

She ignored her roommate, making her way quickly to her room. Shannon relentlessly followed her, ignoring the slammed door and Kate's furious expression when she stood in the centre of the messy floor, her arms crossed.

"You really can't take a hint, can you?" demanded the brunette.

"Just don't want you. Jack said something emotional again, didn't he? And you freaked? Does Cooper tell you to do things like that, or does it come naturally to you?" wondered Shannon.

"Naturally," admitted Kate with a glare, refusing to answer the other questions. Shannon rolled her eyes and joined her on the bed. Kate watched her in admiration, wishing she could be as beautiful and uncomplicated as Shannon was.

"Did he tell your he loved you again?" asked Shannon curiously. Kate rolled her eyes. Shannon, while being often full of wisdom, was rarely sensitive.

"Yeah," admitted Kate. Wishing Shannon would stop asking, knowing she would not.

"Did he mention something about wanting to get some? Because you'd hardly be able to blame him," said Shannon fairly. Kate shook her head.

"He didn't even mention it," she said. She'd begun wishing he would, so that she would have good reason to get affronted.

"Amazing. Just tell me," demanded Shannon, her patience decreasing.

Kate frowned slightly, not wanting yet another voice in her head.

"He asked me to marry him," she admitted.

To Kate's relief, Shannon momentarily let the conversation trail off into a shocked silence.

"Apparently he really does want to get some," she said at length.

"Do you think that's why he asked?" demanded Kate instantly.

"I thought you didn't care?" asked Shannon, an eyebrow raised. Kate glared.

"It's not like that."

Shannon managed to quench another eye roll, and then turned seriously back to her roommate.

"Do you want my advice?" she asked.

Kate shook her head.

"I think," she began, continuing as if Kate had not spoken, "That you should tell him you love him. And that you want to marry him. Screw Cooper."

Kate watched her go, wishing desperately that it were that simple.

"What did you say?" asked Shannon curiously, pausing at the door. "You didn't mention."

"What do you _think _I said?" asked Kate. "I said no."

* * *

By the time she received the call, headed down to his office in a cab and heard the news, she wondered if she'd somehow subconsciously set herself up for the fall. 

It was not as if Shannon could ever be fully trusted with secrets, even though she kept Shannon's. It was not as if Shannon's loyalties were truly to Kate. Shannon's loyalties were to Cooper, who held her wellbeing in his hands. Just as Kate's were.

So she was not surprised when she realized that he knew. She did not feel surprise, but she did feel dread.

Cooper immediately let her into his office, not feeling it necessary to make her wait nervously. When she entered, she could have sworn that she saw pride, almost affection in his eyes.

She sat in front of his desk, crossed her legs. Looked bravely into his cold eyes and awaited the inevitable.

"So, I hear you've been doing quite well for yourself," said Cooper. She shrugged.

"I guess."

"I always thought he'd fall in love with you easily, but I never imagined he'd become so serious. You played him perfectly, Meg."

Kate suppressed a glare, hating to hear herself spoken about like this. Hated to think of herself playing Jack.

"So he wants to make it official."

"Shannon told you?" demanded Kate.

"No, no. She told one of the other girls, who told me. Still wouldn't recommend trusting her. Now," he said, shuffling papers on his desk. "What's this I hear about your negative reaction?"

"You said I had to make him love me. You never said why, and I never asked. But you never said I had to marry him. I can't destroy him like that."

"That's because I only ever hoped. I never imagined you'd play it all so beautifully. I might have underestimated you."

She slumped her head as he ignored her protests, knowing she'd lost.

"You're going to go back now, aren't you? Tell him you got a little scared. He might want you more for it."

Kate nodded mutely. She left abruptly, not bidding him goodbye as was her custom. She left, never having felt like more of a whore.

* * *

It was her lips that greeted him, and not her words. 

She was such a passionate woman, their encounters so heated, that he could not fully comprehend her repeated refusals. He'd managed never to press her, but had begun to want her desperately.

They found their way to his sofa, fell heavily down onto it, limbs entangled. Her wandering hands desperately shed his shirt, admired his bare chest with her eyes and with her hands. His own found their way under her shirt, to her bra strap, and he began to intimately touch the skin he'd only ever glimpsed, dreamed about.

Common sense somehow overrode other senses. With difficulty, she shoved his larger body off off hers. He sat up on the couch, awkwardly pulled his shirt back on over his bare chest as she hurriedly re-arranged herself.

"What the hell was that?" he demanded. Running a hand through her hair, she met courageous eyes with him and put voice to the words running through her head:

"Ask me again."


	13. Tell Me Now Or Tell Me Never

Chapter Thirteen: Tell Me Now or Tell Me Never 

Kate had a small, selfish dream that after their engagement, their relationship would continue on as normal. She was not surprised when it did not.

Overnight she was swept into a new world. A world where she proudly wore a ring on her left hand, referred casually to her fiance, Jack. Where Jack was no longer afraid to cherish her, to tell her he loved her.

Where she received elaborate bouquets of flowers from her now hospitable future mother – in – law, where she heard Claire (who had somehow obtained her phone number) screaming through the phone in excitement that she'd always wanted a sister. A world where she met strangers who knew Jack and therefore assumed they knew her. A world where these strangers asked casual questions that married people were required to have answers to, such as where they were getting married and had they thought about kids yet?

Kate spent most of the week following her engagement taking deep breaths, forcing herself to be calm.

At the end of this week she found herself once more at Jack's home, a place she'd become rapidly more comfortable at. She intentionally kept him away from her home, not wanting to explain the mail addressed to the mysterious Maggie Ryan, or Shannon's dates every nights in a new evening gown each time.

Jack's home was full of guests. Though she was tempted to hole herself up with her friends, Claire was mingling with Charlie, Jack was distracted by his mother. She had invited Shannon, who had brought Sayid and was completely distracted by him. Sawyer she had invited, but he had yet to show.

She listened patiently as several older woman spoke over her head, after offering the usual congratulations and had asked a few curious questions.

Jack magically materialized at her elbow when a taller blonde walked toward her, closer to Jack's age than her own. He placed a comforting arm around her, and she felt herself preparing for something, though she did not know what.

"Hey Juliet," said Jack, greeting the woman who had come over to see them. The woman smiled, and turned her gaze to Kate.

"Congratulations," she offered.

"Uh, sorry. Kate, this is Juliet. We work together. Juliet, this is my fiancee, Kate," said Jack proudly. Kate nodded.

"You're a Doctor?" she asked, studying the woman's face. For a moment she'd been terrified that the stranger was Jack's first wife, Sarah. The two women looked similar.

"Fertility specialist," she said, somewhat smugly.

"Thank you for coming," said Kate.

"Of course. Jack talks about you all the time," said Juliet, meeting Jack's eye and smirking. He looked away uncomfortably.

"You, too," lied Kate. She had been tempted to tell the stranger that Jack had never spoken of her, but it hardly seemed tactful. The blonde nodded, barely seeming to register her.

Kate leaned into Jack, tilted her head onto his shoulder. He seemed surprised for a second by her possessive gesture, but quickly adjusted his body so that theirs were pressed up against each other.

Juliet's gaze flicked to the diamond on Kate's finger, made an almost invisible frown, and took her leave. Kate slowly detached herself from Jack, letting her hand wander in to his.

"Your ex?" muttered Kate, her mouth close to his ear.

"I'll explain later," he replied, before smiling at yet another unrecognizable guest, who immediately rushed over to admire the ring, appraise Kate, and offer their congratulations to them both.

* * *

Even after the party, the Kate that Jack dealt with was one more akin to the Kate he'd first known than the Kate he knew now.

She sat stiffly on the counter as he washed dishes, flinching slightly whenever he spoke to her, as if caught in her own world. He watched out of the corner of his eye as she fiddled with her engagement ring, taking it off her finger as if it burdened her.

She didn't noticed his presence until he was standing in front of her, staring patiently into her eyes.

"What's wrong?" he asked. She looked up in surprise.

"Who's Juliet?" she asked, asking the first deflecting question she could think of.

"My ex. We were together for a while after Sarah and I divorced," he explained, shrugging.

"And?"

"I was casual about her," he said, shrugging.

"She seems less casual about you," said Kate.

"Kate..." He seemed amused by her jealousy.

"I didn't know any of them," she continued.

"You could have invited your friends besides Shannon and Sayid," said Jack. Kate shrugged, not wanting to admit that she did not have any friends besides them and Sawyer. "Your family, even."

Kate shook her head subconsciously, knowing immediately that she had to get him off this subject. Instead of another lie, she spoke the first words that came to her. A truth.

"I'm scared."

Jack's dark eyes widened, and in that instant she looked more vulnerable than he'd ever seen her.

"You have nothing to be scared of."

"It's easy for you to say! You've done this all before. I've..."

"I haven't done this before."

"What?" she asked.

"I loved Sarah. I truly did. But with you..." Jack trailed off, lost for words.

"What?" she asked again, desperate to draw the words out of him, to reassure herself.

"I love you, Kate," he said simply. She nodded.

"They all think we're crazy. They all think I'm out for you for your money, and they think you're just marrying some little..._ arm candy_," she said in disgust, having a flashback of how many times she'd felt like this, with other men.

"It's not true. So it doesn't matter," said Jack simply. Kate nodded, wishing that his belief in her could make it all true. She'd never had anyone who believed in her so strongly. She knew she'd never had anyone who loved her so much.

Impulsively she leaned forward to kiss him. He moved into the place between her legs and she wrapped them around his waist as his arms wound around hers. When he lifted her into the air, she put his arms around his neck, pressing them intimately together.

Jack took a stumbling step backward, still holding her in his arms, before stopping. Breaking their kiss, he smiled somewhat sadly at her.

"Wait. Do you have to go home?" he asked.

Kate, realizing that she still could not indulge in him, slid out of his embrace and backed to the counter.

"Sayid and Shannon will be there. They're not known to be discreet. But..." she gave him a stern look before his excited expression could fully develop. "Only if I can borrow some pajamas."

Ten minutes later Kate, dressed in a pair of Jack's boxers and a t-shirt that engulfed her, got into bed with her fiance and proceeded to have the best sleep she'd had since her abrupt lifestyle change a year previously.


	14. What Should Matter Most

Chapter Fourteen: What Should Matter Most 

"Jack?"

Kate Austen woke, and was suddenly as wide awake as she'd been deeply sleeping. She shoved Jack as a loud female voice rang through the house, and footsteps began to draw closer to the bedroom.

"What?" he grumbled, slowly turning to face her. She shot him wide, panicked eyes as the bedroom door opened and Margo stepped in.

The elderly woman stopped, stared at them in surprise for a moment and then continued, carefully closing the door behind her. Kate sat straight up and smoothed her hair, infinitely glad that she was still wearing his clothes, the ones she'd worn to bed the night before.

"I didn't think you'd be here, Kate," said Margo. To her right, Jack scoffed.

"She's my fiance, Mom. Are you really that surprised?" he asked.

Margo frowned slightly as her son sat up as well, revealing his bare, muscular chest.

"I actually came to find you, Kate. I realized I didn't have your address, and I've made an appointment for us at a boutique downtown in an hour," explained Margo briskly.

"Boutique?" asked Kate blankly.

"Well you need a dress, don't you? My friend owns the best place in the city. Come now, we can stop at your house on the way," said Margo. After a nervous glance at Jack, Kate reluctantly climbed out of bed.

Kate, dressed in the same casually dressy outfit she'd been wearing the night before to her engagement party, followed Margo out to her car.

She'd never been so relieved as when she saw Claire in the passenger seat, blonde hair tied back into a low knot at the nape of her neck, a smile already present on her face when she met eyes with Kate.

Claire followed Kate up to her apartment when they arrived there, not bothering to explain her reasoning for this to her stepmother. Kate rounded on her as soon as they got in the door, annoyed and confused.

"She just showed up. Literally came into the bedroom without even knocking. Who _does_ that?" she demanded.

"Margo Shephard. She never could understand that Jack's a grown up now. Plus she's trying to make up for the fact that I was pregnant when I got married, and took away her chance of having a huge country club wedding and inviting everyone she's ever met."

Kate glared at Claire, who seemed to be struggling not to laugh.

"This isn't funny! I don't want a big wedding. I barely even want a small wedding. The engagement party was bad enough," said Kate.

"What do you mean, you barely even want a small wedding?" asked Claire, beginning to look protective.

"I mean that I'd be happy to go the City Hall route," covered Kate, quickly. Claire nodded.

"We went that route. Me and Charlie. Jack was the witness, we didn't even tell my Dad and Margo," said Claire, shrugging. "Jack likes weddings. And you like Jack, so..."

Kate nodded in resignation before heading off to her bedroom to change.

* * *

Less than an hour later, even Claire's encouraging speeches could not convince Kate that she'd made the right decision.

Elegantly dressed woman held dresses in front of her, offered her tea, discussed the various merits of tiaras and veils. Spoke mostly to Margo, who took notes and told them what Kate wanted in a dress.

When they came across the first of the dresses to be deemed acceptable, Margo sent Kate into the dressing room with an attending to help her. Claire followed her in while Margo waited on the outside, discussing the finer points of the wedding with the shop owner.

After a complicated process, which involves many buttons, several hooks and a zipper, the attendant stepped back to allow Kate to evaluate her appearance.

After the initial shock that came of Kate seeing herself in a wedding dress, she had to admit that it really was a nice dress. It flattered her figure reasonable well, the fabric felt nice under her hands and it was not as uncomfortable as she'd feared it would be.

She caught sight of Claire's expression in the mirror.

"What?" she asked, smiling.

"It's not very you," said Claire bluntly. Kate sighed, having already come to this conclusion. The gown, with its long sweeping skirt and dramatic trumpet sleeves, was not what she'd been looking for. She twirled around in it, the excitement of being in a wedding dress affecting her in spite of herself.

She caught the eyes of the attendant, who opened her mouth to say something productive. Kate cut her off.

"Wait. Can you go in there and get something a bit... simpler?" she suggested.

"But Mrs. Shephard says..." she began nervously.

"It's my wedding," said Kate. She caught a glimpse of the attendant's nametag. "Um, Nicole? I'll make sure she doesn't yell at her."

This seemed to strengthen her resolve, and she left. She returned a few minutes later, apparently having avoided notice, her arms full of gowns with noticeable less tulle.

"She didn't see me," said Nicole nervously. Kate nodded and proceeded to try on the gowns.

* * *

"I like that one," said Claire, after what seemed like quite long time.

Nicole, their comrade, who had been sitting on a chair looking exhausted, stood up abruptly.

"It's definitely the best so far," she said enthusiastically, walking over to Kate to straighten out the short train.

Kate stared at herself in the dress, craning slightly to see how it looked behind and from the sides. She raised her eyebrows, surprised when she was pleased with the sight.

"You look beautiful," said Claire honestly, coming up to join them as well.

The dress was strapless and empire waisted. The skirt flowed, and was not puffy. The bodice was ornamented with beading, but the dress for the most part was as simple as Kate had hoped for.

Margo chose that moment to walk into the room, and seemed surprised to see Kate in the dress.

"I don't remember seeing that one. Is it what you really want?" asked Margo in speculation.

"It's my favourite," said Kate, winking discretely at Nicole and failing to mention how it had come to them.

"It is nice," conceded Margo. "That's fine. We'll have to get you a veil, though. And some nice jewelry, we can't leave your neck bare like that. Maybe we could rent some? Maybe after we get the flowers, to make sure you don't clash. Oh, and the country club called today, to confirm your booking."

Kate gaped as Margo left, to give Kate time to change back into her clothing.

"This is insane. It's my wedding, not hers. What does she think she..."

"Kate," said Claire sternly, cutting her off. "We already talked about this. And anyway, it means all you have to do is choose colours and stuff. She's going to do all the hard stuff for you."

"But..."

"What do you care, anyway? I thought you didn't want a big wedding," reminded Claire. Kate smiled, conceding, as Margo bustled back in.

"I've just remembered, we should look at bridesmaid dresses while you're here. Who will you want? I met your friend Shannon last night..." said Margo.

"Yeah. Shannon. And Claire," said Kate casually. Claire gaped.

"Me?"

"Of course," said Kate, smiling. Claire agreed, looking flustered.

"Well now that's taken care of. Do you want to..."

"I was thinking we could go to a normal store and just get them dresses that are the same colour or something. I mean all the bridesmaid dresses here are..." Kate shrugged. "I want to avoid being a cliche. I think they'd appreciate it."

Claire nodded eagerly.

"That sounds fine," said Margo reluctantly.

"I'll be out in a minute. Where did you want to go? The Country Club?" asked Kate, as Margo left.

"Thanks," said Claire, grinning.

"No problem. I've always thought matching dresses were in bad taste, anyway."

"Not what I meant."

Kate smirked.

"I know."

* * *

Jack looked alarmed that night when his fiancee returned. She smiled at his panicked expression, as if he half expected her to call off the wedding.

"Don't look like that. It was fine," she said.

"Oh yeah?"

"Sure. I found a dress," said Kate.

"I'll look forward to seeing you in it," he said.

"And Claire's going to be my bridesmaid."

"I'm glad you two are getting along so well. She never took to Sarah."

Kate nodded, dropped the packages she'd been carrying and headed off to his bathroom.

"I love you," he called out, as she left the room. She swung her head around to meet his eyes."

"I..."

The words half came out of her mouth and she willed them to continue, realizing for the first time that she wanted to say it. That she _did._ That she wanted nothing more to return his words and bask in the smile on his face.

"I know," she said with a smile, leaving before she could see his face fall.


	15. Memories To Light Your Way

Chapter Fifteen: Memories to Light Your Way 

"Damn, you know a _lot_ of people," commented Kate.

Jack watched as she pushed her chair away from the table and tipped it onto its two back legs. She let her hair down from her ponytail, and sifted her fingers through it.

"Maybe just compared to you. Are you sure you don't want to invite anyone else?" he asked. She shook her head hurriedly. "A lot of them are my mother's people, actually."

Jack stood up from the chair he'd been sitting at, his list of guests in front of him on the table. He wandered vaguely toward the kitchen.

"Has Shannon found a new roommate yet?" he asked.

Kate shook her head. Somehow, without any conversation taking place regarding the matter, they'd decided to live together at Jack's house after their marriage. She didn't explain that she didn't have to find anyone new, that Cooper would simply place another one of his girls there, as he had once done for her.

"Do you need help packing?" he asked. She shook her head. He'd barely been in her bedroom, and she didn't want to give him the opportunity to sort through the relics of her life.

"Shannon will help me," she said, by way of an explanation.

Idly she picked up his list of guests, smiling to herself whenever she came across a name she even vaguely recognized.

"You're inviting Juliet?" she asked in surprise.

"She's a friend."

Kate nodded, carefully searching for any mention of the name "Sarah", and found none.

"You're welcome to invite any of your exes," said Jack. He searched her face, and Kate knew that he was longing for her to mention something, anything, about her life. "Sawyer, maybe."

Kate laughed.

"Sawyer isn't my ex."

"Oh? He seems so..."

"He's protective. He's a good friend,"she explained.

"And he's coming?" asked Jack.

"Of course. I need to fill up my side," she said, laughing. He grinned. His guests overpowered hers to the extent that they were going to bother to have the guests stick to specific sides.

"So he'll bring a woman?"asked Jack. Kate nodded.

"Sawyer has lots of women."

Silence descended upon them. Kate looked at Jack, and saw that he was unable to keep a smile off his face. She was glad that she'd been able to honestly tell him that nothing had happened with Sawyer. It seemed to set him at ease.

"Sarah's not coming?" she asked, deciding there was no better time for the conversation.

"Mom probably invited her. She won't come," he said reassuringly. Kate stood and walked over to where he was standing.

"Why not?"

"We didn't part on the best of terms."

Seeing as this was the most information she'd received on the subject, Kate was fully willing to pry.

"Why?"

"I wasn't around. Marriage wasn't anything like she thought it would be," explained Jack.

"Most things aren't," she observed, turning her back on him to walk back to the table. Jack put his hand on her arm to stop her.

"She cheated on me. I wanted to make it work. I hadn't been doing the best I could, and I wanted to start to. She didn't."

Kate turned back to face him, knowing she had no words to say to him that could make this better.

"So I'm going to try harder. I'm going to be around," he promised her. She let her hand slip in to his, contemplating the beautiful blonde, Sarah, and of how much she had changed Jack.

Kate searched for words, knowing he deserved them.

"I lost my virginity to a man named Tom," said Kate abruptly. Jack's eyes met her in surprise, willing her to continue. "He was my best friend. And I loved him, and he thought we were going to be together forever and ever, and get married and have lots of kids, and I knew I never could, even though I wanted to."

"What happened?" asked Jack.

"I left. I ran. I couldn't stay put," she explained.

"Do you regret it?"

Jack's question was simple, his expression was stoic.

"He's happy now," she said simply. And I'm happy, too."

Considering, Kate thought that Jack had dealt with this revelation of her former life astonishingly well. Nevertheless, she was relieved when the phone started to ring. Distracted, she broke eye contact with him to look for it.

"I think it's coming from your room. I'll get it," said Jack, heading off toward the bedrooms. She nodded and turned back toward the guest lists.

"Oh..."

Kate looked to the door Jack had opened, and bit back a laugh.

She ran to stand beside him, staring into the bedroom he'd all but entered. She rolled her eyes at the sight that greeted her.

Her roommate was lying on her back, her boyfriend Sayid atop her. His muscled body moving in perfect, even thrusts. Her long, smooth leg around him, her head tilted back.

He hurriedly closed the door, glad to have not been seen by them, and turned to Kate.

"You live in the other room, don't you?" he asked. She nodded, restraining a giggle. She studied his face, noticing he looked red and uncomfortable.

"You okay?" she asked cautiously. He nodded tensely.

"Yeah. Of course. Just a little bit... turned on," he admitted.

She agreed awkwardly, and felt a shiver as she noticed how intently he was watching her. She understood, in that moment, how badly he wanted her.

"Shannon_ is_ beautiful," conceded Kate. Jack smirked.

"I'm not thinking about Shannon. _You're_ beautiful, Kate."

Blushing, she took Jack by the hand and led him back to the table.

* * *

Kate and Jack took some advantage of having the apartment to themselves, after Shannon and Sayid left separately. Kate was infinitely glad when Jack did not question Shannon's abrupt departure in a cocktail dress, hours after Sayid had left. 

They spent the evening as they were rapidly becoming accustomed to – Jack cooked in her small, inadequate kitchen, she watched him over his shoulder and did her best to not be actively unhelpful.

They ate dinner on their laps, watching the James Bond marathon on TV. Kate compared the various James Bond's in order of how attractive she found them until Jack became nervous, at which point she moved in closer to him and encouraged his arm to slide around her shoulder.

"Could Sarah cook?" she asked in a small voice. Jack chuckled.

"Better than you, maybe."

While this answer was not as reassuring as she'd hoped it would be, she decided that it was entirely acceptable.

"Are you still scared?" he asked. She shrugged. She lied.

"No."

More reassured by her answer than she had been by his, Jack pulled her farther in to him and firmly kissed the top of her head before letting his attention drift back to the movie.

* * *

Author's note: I'm so sorry for not updating lately, I'll try and get better on that. Thank you for sticking with me! 


	16. Someday You Will Find Me

Chapter Sixteen: Someday You Will Find Me

Kate Austen felt as though she were living someone else's life.

Shannon's life, perhaps. Shannon, who led her around all morning like a dazed child, seemed to be perfectly at ease.

Margo had set up the entire day, but was mysteriously absent. Kate suspected that Jack had somehow convinced his mother to leave his fiancee alone on their wedding day, and for this she was grateful. She could handle the hair appointment, the manicure, the final visit to the country club to ensure that everything was prepared as it should be. She could handle it much better than she would have if Margo had been around, offering helpful suggestions and dropping hints about the kind of wife she expected Kate to be.

Shannon navigated and suggested hairstyles while Claire spent the majority of the day attempting to gage Kate's nerves, to decipher whether or not she needed to be calmed down. Shannon viewed the event light heartedly, seeing it as a chance to dress in a reasonably attractive dress and have a fair amount of people staring at her. Claire was more understanding, having already had a wedding of her own, and Kate appreciated her presence more than she'd thought possible.

Under Shannon's advisement, Kate instructed the hairdresser to twist her hair into a bun, leaving some of the shorter strands down, to give it a toussled look.

She watched as Claire and Shannon changed into their bridesmaid dresses, remarking once again on how much they looked like stereotypical bridesmaid dressed. She shut her eyes as they helped her into her own dress, imagining how Jack's eyes would look when he saw her in it.

* * *

For a man about to get married to a woman he'd only known for a few months, who he knew very little about, who he'd never actually seen completely naked, Jack Shephard was remarkably calm.

At the time of his first wedding he'd been nervous. That he wouldn't be able to be a good husband, a good father. Now he'd experienced being a bad husband, and knew he could correct his mistakes. He had no doubt that he could be a good husband to Kate, a good father to the children they might one day have. He would be a better husband and father than his own father, and he would love his Kate until the day he died.

Once Marc, his best friend since childhood and his best man had gone out to pick up the tuxes they'd reserved, Charlie watched him in bemusement.

"You're remarkably calm," he commented. Jack grinned.

"It's different from your wedding. I don't have a shotgun pressed into my back."

Charlie laughed appreciatively.

"Seriously though, mate. Claire made me promise I'd talk to you. I mean, we love Kate, but doesn't the whole thing seem kind of suspicious. Don't you barely know her?" asked Charlie.

"I know a lot more than when we started dating," he said defensively.

"That's because it took you a month to learn her last name."

"Drop it, Charlie."

Charlie nodded, knowing that he'd done the best he could.

"So long are you're sure."

"Of course I'm sure." He smiled, thinking of his beautiful fiancee for a moment. "She's pretty amazing. You've got to admit."

Charlie thought about Kate: how she was beautiful, unpredictable. How actively Margot disapproved of her, how vastly different she was from Sarah.

"Yeah. That she is."

* * *

Kate listened nervously to the growing sound of chatter coming from the chapel, and reached up to brush an imaginary strand of hair from her face. Claire stopped her as she reached for a makeup brush to correct an imaginary flaw.

"Stop that. You look perfect," she said comfortingly.

"Thanks," she said gratefully. "You too."

Claire, dressed in her bridesmaid dress, smiled.

Both girls looked up, expecting Shannon, when the door entered. Both were surprised when a man entered.

"Sawyer!"

Kate was instantly on her feet. She went forward to hug him. She hadn't seen him lately. He hugged her tightly for a moment before releasing her, looking almost guilty.

"Claire, this is my best friend, Sawyer. Sawyer this is Jack's sister, Claire."

Kate turned to Sawyer.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded.

"Well I was invited, wasn't I? Anyway, I thought you might need support. Figured your Daddy couldn't make it," explained Sawyer. Kate frowned for a moment.

"You came... to give me away?" she asked. He shrugged.

"Figured somebody ought to."

Kate grinned, throwing herself once more into his arms. Claire watched as once more, he held her stiffly. As if he was holding back from something.

And then let go, once more.

* * *

Jack, though not being a superstitious man, was glad that his wedding day was beautiful. He didn't think he would be able to handle another subtle hint that this was not meant to be. His mother's disapproval, his sister's concern, and his fiancee's reluctance was enough for him. He was glad that at least the shining sun and the cloudless sky agreed with him.

Though, to be fair, it was often sunny in southern California.

He stood with Charlie and Marc at the front of the church as it gradually filled with people. He knew, because his mother had told him, that Kate and Claire and Shannon were already preparing in a room off the main chapel, but he hadn't yet seen her.

He felt his throat tighten in anticipation as the organ began to play and the doors were thrust open.

Jack vaguely noticed his sister and Shannon walking down the aisle, before Kate appeared and his eyes focused in on her.

Before he could notice that she was on Sawyer's arm, he noticed that she was beautiful, and above all that she was smiling. Eventually he noticed that her best friend was escorting her, but he pushed back the jealousy he felt at this after a moment and returned the smile she gave him.

Jack forced himself to nod politely at Sawyer when the two reached him. A moment later the man faded from memory once more as Kate took a step toward him and slipped her hand in to his.

As the reverend began to speak, all the nerves that had been building up inside of him for the last hour vanished. He was finally content with the single notion that Kate made him happy, and that he was willing to do anything to make her feel the same.

* * *

As the guests loitered, waiting for Kate and Jack to make an appearance at their reception, Shannon located Sawyer and went quickly to join him.

Sawyer didn't acknowledge the tall blonde who came to stand beside him. She'd never liked him, always disgruntled that he'd never bothered to hit on her. Noting her dislike of him, he'd never cared much for her, either.

"That was a nice thing for you to do, giving Kate away like that," remarked Shannon. "You know. Considering."

"Considering _what_?" he asked in annoyance. He didn't know why he'd bothered to hang around for the reception. The chance that he could find a woman at an event like this drunk enough to go home with him was unlikely.

"Considering the fact that you're in love with her. Must suck."

Sawyer scowled.

"If I was in love with her, why the heck would I be here?" demanded Sawyer. Shannon shrugged.

"Maybe because you're a glutton for punishment. Or maybe because you figure if you hang around long enough she'll leave him and suddenly notice you."

"She's going to leave him. It's all part of the plan, remember?" asked Sawyer. Shannon shrugged.

"If she wanted to con him, she already would have. Oh, my date's over there. I'll see you later."

Sawyer watched, scowling, as she walked toward Sayid and kissed him. As Jack and Kate finally appeared and were announced as Mr. and Mrs. Jack Shephard for the first time, he headed toward the bar.

* * *

"Do you know all these people?" whispered Kate.

Jack smirked and reached out to grab his wife's hand.

"Some of them. A lot of friends of my parents. Marc," he said, gesturing to his best man, "has been my best friend since grade school."

He smiled as two more of his friends approached.

"Kate, this is my friend Jin and his wife Sun," he said.

The woman leaned down to shake Kate's hand, beaming.

"Congratulations. It was a beautiful wedding," said Sun.

"Thank you. How do you two know Jack?" asked Kate, gesturing towards Jin, who was smiling politely but still had not spoken.

"We live nearby. You two should come for dinner soon," said Sun. Kate nodded, shaking off the strange feeling that she would soon be living with Jack.

"We will."

Kate watched them retreat, and turned back to Jack.

"We have couple friends now," she commented. He agreed, and stood up to lead her to the dance floor.

"I guess it comes with being a couple."

Kate sighed and leaned her head on his chest as the music started and they began to dance.

As he murmured into her ear that he loved her, she realized once more how very hard it would be to continue to not return the sentiment.


	17. Build a Home For You

Chapter Seventeen: To Build a Home for You

They left the reception laughing, leaving amidst cameras flashing and music playing and their guests cheering. They stumbled into the limo, hands clasped together, happy and nervous and anticipating all at once.

But as the car moved through the streets and towards Jack's home, they fell silent.

"We're leaving on our honeymoon tomorrow. I booked a cabin. It's in the woods, kind of remote. I thought you'd like that," said Jack awkwardly, after a long stretch of silence.

"That sounds nice," she agreed. Slowly he let his arm wrap around her, conscious that in her sleeveless gown she might be cold. She moved closer to him. He relaxed, but only slightly: ever since he'd proposed to her, he'd been fairly sure how things were going to proceed. That they'd marry quickly, that Margo would attempt to plan their whirlwind wedding, that everything would go as he planned until this moment, after the wedding, when anything could happen. He could not predict how it was going to happen, and he still could not read her in this sense.

The limo pulled up in front of Jack's house and they got out. It was dark already, the neighbourhood was quiet. He felt uncertain, and was reminded of so many earlier nights in their relationship when he'd expected this to happen. With much less ceremony, with much less formality. Just two people getting to know each other on their third or fourth date. Now she was his wife, and it was all different.

Kate smiled slightly as he stopped her just outside his door and lifted her into his arms. He carried her into the house and up the stairs.

He nudged the door of his bedroom open and walked in. Setting her down on the bed, he kicked off his shoes and untied his tie.

Kate watched him, his eyes expressionless as he turned back to her.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Do you really want to do this?"

"What?"

"I mean it. I was happy when you said you'd marry me, but I never thought you would. I just needed things to move forward, and I didn't know how else to make it happen. Now things are moving forward again. Is it what you really want?"

Kate looked sympathetically at him. No wonder he was confused.

"Of course," she said, empathetically.

"But then why..."

"Jack," said Kate, somewhat sternly, rising slightly as she spoke. "Stop talking."

Kate moved, as if about to get out of the bed and stand, but before she could Jack moved toward her and pushed her back down onto it.

He began to kiss her, slowly at first. Faster as her hands found the buttons of his shirt and she undid them hurriedly, her hands running down his hard chest as she did so.

Cautiously his own hands made their way to the zipper in the back of her dress. As he slowly unzipper it, her flesh was revealed to him: the strapless bra she'd been wearing under her wedding dress, lace covered and erotic. He unhooked it, feeling that she had been unknown to him for far too long. He admired her naked form as she slid all the way out of her dress and wrapped her legs around him, their naked flesh touching intimately all over.

He groaned in anticipation, forcing himself to hold off as his wife moved beneath him, already passionate, already desiring.

"I love you," he managed to say, when she was ready for him. For a moment he thought she was going to say it, too, but their next movements overrode all thought.

* * *

They lay together between the sheets, both smiling thoughtfully. Jack could not remember a time he'd been happier, more at peace. He'd thought them to be intimate before this, back in their days of dating, but he'd never felt as intimate, as connected, as he did now.

"Thank you. That was incredible," she said, breaking the silence. He turned to her.

"It was. You were so..." Kate blushed, realizing his implication. It had been a long time since she'd been with a man, and her tightness must have been a giveaway.

"It's been a while," she admitted. She leaned in to kiss him again.

"Ever since that night at the bar, I've..." He cut himself off. What he was about to say, he knew he couldn't say while conveying the proper meaning. He had wanted her desperately ever since that night at the bar, but it didn't mean he wanted her only for that.

"I know you have. Me too." She smirked. "You totally thought you were going to get lucky that night, too. That Doctor line really work on the ladies, Jack?"

"Hey!" he said indignantly. "It's not really a line. I _am_ a Doctor."

She moved in closer to him to cure his injured pride.

"I know. I guess you figured out pretty early that I wasn't that kind of girl," said Kate. Jack smiled and kissed her again.

They kissed again, their desire once again inflamed. He moved on top of her to kiss her again.

She wrapped her arms around his neck as they began to kiss, lovingly and longingly. He looked up to meet her eyes as his lips began to slid down her neck.

"I still know so little about you," he said, gazing into her green eyes. She nodded.

"One day I'll tell you," she promised.

And she meant it. One day, she would. One day she would tell him, and it would destroy them both. As his lips began to explore her body once more, she knew that they had to cherish the time they had together until then.

* * *

When they awoke the next morning they were pressed together, as close as when they had fallen asleep.

"What time's our flight?" she asked when he awoke, slightly after her.

"Not until the afternoon. Are you packed?" he asked. She laughed.

"My whole life is in boxes at my apartment. I was going to get the movers to bring it over here while we're away, but I set some stuff aside," she explained.

"So I guess we don't really have anything to do," he commented.

"Yeah," she said, agreeing. Her brain was telling her to do her normal morning things: get up, get dressed, make coffee. She was telling herself that things needed to be done but really all she wanted to do was lie in bed with her husband and do nothing at all.


	18. Make the World Brand New

Chapter Eighteen: Make the World Brand New

Living in LA, Kate missed the seasons. There were a lot of things she missed out on while living in the city, but the extent of these things never really occurred to her until she left it.

As Jack awkwardly carried their suitcases into the rural mountain cabin, slipping once along the way and cursing loudly, she smiled and realized that he was not a country boy in the same way that she was a country girl.

The interior of the cabin was small and cozy, completely at odds with Jack's modernly decorated apartment back in LA. He watched, disoriented, as she ran around, turning on lights and looking behind doors. He was still tired from their flight, and his mind still hadn't fully moved beyond their first time together, and the subsequent hours spent in bed.

"I took Sarah to Nassau on our honeymoon," said Jack, regretting his words almost as soon as he spoke. He was relieved when she smiled. "It was different than this."

"What, nothing but swim up bars and sex on the beach?"

"Sarah didn't like sex on the beach. She didn't like how sand got everywhere... Why am I telling you this?"

Kate shrugged, and Jack cursed himself once more for bringing up Sarah in front of her.

"Don't look so freaked. You were married to her for years, I get that." Jack watched in interest as Kate peeled off the shirt she was wearing and began to rummage in her suitcase for another. "I'm going to out. Do you want to come? We can explore. I bet if we look we can find a..."

Still transfixed by the image of his half naked wife, Jack began to walk toward her.

"Woman, do you never rest? We just got here," he said. She smirked.

"Oh, so you want to _rest?"_

Jack shrugged.

"Eventually."

Kate took a step backward and found herself pressed up against a wall. Jack smiled at her as he reached her and placed a hand on either side of her body.

"You seem to have dishonourable intentions on your mind, Mr. Shephard," said Kate teasingly. He leaned down to kiss her, lightly.

"I've always had dishonourable intentions toward you, Mrs. Shephard, but up until lately I've been too honourable to act on them." She found herself at a disadvantage as his hands began to roam around her bare skin. "Now come on. Place is empty for miles. We don't even have to worry about being overheard."

Kate smiled and followed her husband into the bedroom. She was aware that they had different ideas for their honeymoon but it was far from inconvenient for her.

* * *

Jack was able to delay her for several hours, but eventually he gave up and she went off on her own to explore.

He wandered around while she was gone, surprised to find himself missing her. Though they had dated for months, they'd never been together for such a solid block of time and he'd been surprised by how much he enjoyed it.

It felt so different from his first marriage. Sarah had been so needy. They'd both been needy. Kate was so independent, so inappropriate for him, for the society he was a member of. So often, it ran through his head the long list of reasons why it was inappropriate. That she was so much younger than him. Though he knew it bothered her, he barely noticed. Only on days like today, when they'd spent hours on a plane, followed it up by hours in bed, and she'd still been itching to go out and explore. Some days he did feel older.

He often ran these reasons through his head, but rarely they were any sort of actual obstacle to him.

* * *

When Kate returned he was on his laptop, browsing through his emails. He looked up guiltily when the door slammed shut.

"We really do have different ideas of what constitutes a honeymoon," she said with a smile. She walked over to him and sat on his lap.

Jack linked his hands around her body, and realized vaguely that she was about to ask for something he was not going to want to do.

"Come out with me? It's really nice," she said. He glanced out the window and frowned subconsciously.

"It's getting dark, Kate," said Jack. She shrugged.

"We'll be back before it's totally dark. Come on. There's a river, and some great climbing trees. You'll love it," she promised.

Reluctantly he followed her out the door, rationalizing it with the thought that they could make up for doing what she enjoyed by spending the night back in the cabin, doing what they both enjoyed.

* * *

Jack cast a suspicious sideways glance at his wife as the sky began to darken quickly.

"We're lost, aren't we?" he asked. She shook her head quickly.

"No. I mean, I left a trail for us to take back. We can't be lost." She glanced over her shoulder and intently studied an oddly hanging branch and then frowned.

He watched her as she took several confident steps than then faltered, checking her surroundings once more.

"Kate, clearly we're lost," he stated. She turned to him in frustration.

"It's just that it looks so different in the dark!" she exclaimed. They both looked up as the sun sunk into the hills, sending the last few rays of light into the forest they walked in.

"It's okay. Look, I'll..." Jack reached into the pocket of his jeans and withdrew his cell phone. He cursed when he flipped it open to see that it had no bars. "Well, maybe not."

Kate giggled nervously as they looked around the clearing they were in. She reached into her backpack and withdrew a water bottle.

"Thirsty? I also have granola bars and some oranges," she said helpfully.

"Were you ever a girl scout?" he asked curiously, taking an orange.

"No. My dad was and I used to go hiking a lot," she said. She handed her pack to him and he was relieved to find the food and water as well as a blanket, a lighter and a flashlight.

"Okay. We can work with this. Want to make a fire?" he suggested.

Some time later, after having collected rocks to make a fire pit and sticks to make a fire, they huddled together in front of it.

"I'm sorry. I know this isn't how you imagined the first night of our honeymoon," she said. He chuckled.

"I've learned to expect the unexpected with you, Kate," said Jack. She nodded.

"You know, I like marriage so far," she said, surprising him.

"Yeah. It's fun," he agreed.

"Let's keep it that way," she said, suddenly serious. "Let's not become bitter. If we stop having fun, let's make sure to have it again."

"We should have put it in the vows," he mused. He looked down at her and realized how serious she was. "Okay. I promise."

She moved in closer to him, both for warmth and comfort.

"We should live like this all the time. We could have a tree house and go swimming in the ocean," said Kate.

"Oh, there's an ocean now?" asked Jack in amusement. She nodded with certainty.

"Oh, there'd be an ocean."

"Would it be warm there?" he asked.

"All the time," she promised. They looked sideways at each other and kissed. He held her as he moved onto his back and she climbed astride him.

"What would we do besides swim in our ocean?" he asked. She kissed him and then looked thoughtfully at him.

"I don't know. Have sex in the jungle?" she suggested.

"Oh, there's a jungle now?" he teased. She nodded.

"There's _definitely_ a jungle," she affirmed.


End file.
